C'mon Man: Masturbating in Dorm Bathrooms

So apparently the University of Michigan is trying to stop their sexually repressed students from self appreciation in group bathrooms. The University is trying to save their pipes but don't realize the negative effects these measures have on their students pipes. C'mon man put the students first! I can't wait to see how this is enforced. Hidden cameras? Semen sniffing dogs? I would love to hear a story of someone getting busted while, well....(fill in the blank, SOTB is child friendly). It seems like all this is going to do is cut down on the number of showers students take, because really, how many college kids shower just to get clean.